Friday, April 11, 2014

Call me anything but please, please don't call me that



Customer Service Rep: Thank you for calling eBay customer support, THOM-as (pronouncing the “th” in Thomas as one pronounces the “th” in “thumb”). How can I help you?

TD: I listed a British World War One poster a few days ago. It hasn’t gotten many views and no bids which is surprising because that particular poster is rare and very much in demand, so I went back and double-checked. I listed it in the category “Collectibles/Militaria/WWI/Great Britain/Posters” but it’s showing up in “Sporting Goods/Sports Memorabilia/Cards/Posters.” I revised it but nothing changed – it’s still in the wrong category.

Customer Service Rep: OK, THOM-as, I will be happy to help you with that.

TD: Miss, for the record, you don’t pronounce the “h” – it’s pronounced TOM-us, not THOM-as.

Customer Service Rep: Give me a minute, THOM-as, and let me take a look. What is the item number?

TD: One six one two seven three eight seven nine five nine zero.



Customer Service Rep: Thank you for that information, THOM-as.

TD: Uh, you really shouldn’t pronounce that “h.” It doesn’t bother me but Thomas is one of the most common names there is and it might bother some other Thomas in the future. 

Customer Service Rep: I see the issue, THOM-as. I suggest you end the listing and relist it under the correct category.

TD: As opposed to revising it?

Customer Service Rep: Yes THOM-as, for some reason the revision you made did not register.

TD: Look, if you’re going to persist in repeating my first name in every sentence, would you please pronounce it TOM-us, not THOM-as? Haven’t you ever met someone named Thomas before?

Customer Service Rep: No, you are the first.

TD: Well, the “h” is silent.

Customer Service Rep: What does that mean?

TD: It means you don’t pronounce it.

Customer Service Rep: Why?

TD: I dunno, you just don't.

Customer Service Rep: OK THOM-as, is there anything else I can assist you with today?

TD: No.

Customer Service Rep: Thanks for calling eBay, THOM-as. Have a great day.

TD: You, too.

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