Lab assistant, reviewing a checklist at radiology center where I am about to have an MRI: Do you have a pacemaker?
TD: No
Lab assistant: Any other electronic implants or devices?
TD: No.
Lab assistant: Stents?
TD: No.
Lab assistant: Shunts?
TD: No.
Lab assistant: Body piercings?
TD: Nope.
Lab assistant: Hand grenades?
TD: Hand grenades? Do I look like a terrorist? I'm a grandfather. I have white hair for Chrissakes!
Lab assistant: I said "hearing aids."
TD: Oh. I'm sorry I raised my voice. Yes, I do ... but I'm not wearing them today.
Clerk: Obviously.
