It's a sure bet you'll love this STD

I'm a stock trader. Have been for for years and years.

Sometimes I make money. Sometimes I lose it. That's the way it goes.

I'm sure you're saying to yourself, "I wish Tom would tell me the stocks he's trading right now so that I, too, can be a successful trader."

My pleasure. Below is a list of the stocks I'm playing around with these days, along with one of two recommendations for each: LONG or SHORT.


If you are unfamiliar with the terms we Wall Street insiders use, here's all you need to know.

When I say go LONG, I am recommending you buy the company's stock, secure in the knowledge its price will go up.

When I say go SHORT, I'm recommending you sell the company's stock in lieu of buying it, because its price is going to decline.

"How," you ask, "Can I do that?"

By borrowing shares from the rightful owner (without telling him - your broker will handle the messy details), then selling those shares to some schmuck who is under the impression you own them. Once the price declines, you'll then buy from someone else the same number of shares you sold and pocket the difference between the higher price you sold them for (even though you never owned them) and the lower price you bought them for, at which point the shares you sold (but never owned) will somehow be placed back into the account of the person from whom you borrowed them in the first place. What could be easier?

Banco Santander
STD

Not only is this Spanish bank plagued by a ticker symbol many investors find off-putting, it has the bad luck to be the largest bank in a nation with a 26 percent unemployment rate - a country with a national debt of approximately 850 quadrillion Euros. STD's stock has plummeted in recent months from $11 a share to just over $6 but, importantly, the bank hasn't reduced its dividend. At this point, it's paying an annualized dividend just north of 17 percent - more than than the conservative "safe" rate of return Madoff promised his investors - so if you're looking for income, STD is a good play. And here's what the dopes on Wall Street, who've been so busy spending their bonuses from last year, have failed to realize. Though it's headquartered in Spain, most of STD's revenues come from Brazil, an economy that's booming. Earlier this week Goldman Sachs added STD to its "conviction buy" list and everyone on the Street knows the folks at Goldman never lie. My recommendation: BUY.

The Talbot's

TLB

For years, this women's clothing retailer watched helplessly as its sales declined due to the death and/or incapacitation of its aging customer base. Concerned, the board of directors brought in a new CEO. Her strategy - offering hipper, more revealing clothes that would appeal to younger "working" women - backfired badly when shoppers realized her definition of "working women," driving away the few remaining customers the company had. Several months ago the board announced the CEO's "retirement" but - get this - she's still on the job because no CEO in his or her right mind would want to take over this train wreck of a company. Thanks to my wife for telling me about this one! Tom's recommendation: SHORT. 

Apple Computer

APPL

Having read Walter Isaacson's biography of Steve Jobs, who, year after year, pissed away tens of millions of dollars by insisting on picayune design changes customers could neither see nor appreciate, such as "pretty" circuit boards, I'm convinced that, now that he's out of the picture, APPL will be more profitable than ever. While Apple's upside prospects in the U.S. are limited - the last American who didn't have an iPhone, Myrtle J. Stuckenschneider of Ada, Okla., took delivery of hers last month - Chinese consumers are so crazed to own Apple gadgets that fake Apple stores have been popping up all over the country selling "fake" Apple products. Though its stock has doubled in 12 months, billions of upwardly mobile Chinese, who are anxiously awaiting the next iteration of the iPad and iPhone, can't be wong. There's nothing "fake" about the money you'll earn with AAPL! Tom's recommendation: BUY. 

Delta Air Lines

DAL

DAL failed to meet analyst earnings expectations for the quarter ended March 31, blaming the shortfall on rising fuel costs. What management has refused to acknowledge for years is that the real reason Delta has high fuel costs is that virtually all its flights - even flights from Boston to Hartford - are routed through Atlanta. The fuel savings that would result from eliminating this unnecessary stop would go a long way toward restoring investor confidence. DAL's reputation for treating customers like turds in a punch bowl has also suppressed growth. Friends arrived in Sydney on a Delta flight, only to learn their luggage had been sent to Lyons, France. They were handed a card with the number of the company's "lost baggage" department in Atlanta. When they called, they were placed on hold for more than an hour and forced to listen to "Where Have You Gone Billy Boy, Billy Boy?" over and over until, at long last, someone picked up and said she had no idea where their bags were and advised the frustrated travelers not to call again because it was a holiday weekend and the desk was short-staffed. Speaking of "short," Tom recommends you SHORT this pig.

Volkswagen

VLKAY

On a recent trip I rented a diesel version of VW's all-new Passat and was impressed not only by the mileage (600 miles per tank) but by the styling and handling. So impressed that, when I got home, I rushed to my local VW dealer and took one for a test drive, then spent two hours choosing colors and options. Then I remembered I had a perfectly good car, apologized to the salesman for wasting his time, and drove home. But (and this is important) lots of people do need cars and, because it was recently named Motor Trend's Car of the Year, the Passat is the one they'll be buying. VW's sporty Jetta, elegant CC and spiffy new Beetle ain't too shoddy either. Tom's recommendation: BUY.

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