Flipper is impaled on my palm tree

Friend or foe?

Whatever it is, it's alive!

A friend and I exchange emails yukking it up whenever we run across news reports about people who claim to see visions. For instance, the face of Jesus in a grilled cheese sandwich or an image of the Virgin Mary formed out of mold on a shower curtain.

Now I'm seeing visions, too.

Every Spring, the palm tree in my back yard sprouts giant pea-pod like growths that, when they burst open, reveal a bunch of white seeds. (See below.)

White seeds that have burst

out of a palm pod.

I have no clue what those white seedy things are. I could look it up online but don't really give a shit. All I know is that if the pod isn’t cut off the tree trunk before it bursts, the seeds drop into the pool and clog the filtration equipment. So whenever I see one has sprouted, I try to cut it off before it pops open.

Today I spotted a new pod. I got my clippers and was preparing to snip away when I noticed it’s not a pod at all, but either:

                                               

A) a dolphin that took a flying

 leap out of the bay about a mile

 west of here and somehow 

wound up impaled on my palm. 

B) the reincarnation of Audrey II, 

the plant from The Little Shop 

of Horrors, which ate everything and

everyone in sight.

If it's a dolphin, it's against the law to kill it. Besides, I loved Flipper and wouldn't want to hurt it.

If, on the other hand, it's Audrey II, it'll probably eat the dachshunds first, then my wife, then me. Maybe it will eat me first. 

I don't know what I'm messing with.

Advice anyone?