Sorry I haven't written but these are the dog days

My grand-dog, Topanga, enjoying the dog days of summer

I haven’t blogged for more than a week. I thought about it, I really did, but these are the dog days and I'm lazy. If I had blogged, I could have told you that my local supermarket is selling tomatoes from New Jersey for $4.95 a pound and that people with more money than sense are happily snapping them up. I could have said how sad it is we have a president who holds businesspeople in contempt. I could have written about why I don’t understand why the hell this country can’t keep guns out of the hands of loons like that nutcase who killed all those kids in Colorado. I could have told you how much I love Apple products. When my beloved six-year-old MacBook finally gave up the ghost the other night,  I left home at 8 pm, drove 15 miles to the Apple Store, and was home by 9 with a fully functioning new MacBook Pro that does everything but wipe my behind and there's probably an app for that somewhere. I could have written about how Mitt Romney is probably going to lose because the guy has the charisma of a deer tick. I could have said that my wife has been obsessed  -- obsessed --  with finding a dress for our son’s wedding in January and that she finally bought it today and it looks great. When I asked why she bought it so early (men usually wait until an hour before an event) she said there won’t be any dresses in January. (So ladies, load up.) I could have written about how sick I am of getting robo calls from that bitch Rachel at Cardmember Services who has called three times a week for two years. I could have told you all about the swanky wedding reception we attended last weekend that made Prince William and Kate Middleton’s look like trailer trash. Yeah, I could have written about a lot of things and I would have probably been too lazy to even indent my paragraphs. But I didn’t. It’s about to rain and I promised I’d grill some shrimp before the sky opens up. Here’s my recipe.

                                Tom’s Secret Shrimp Basting Sauce

Mix ½ stick melted butter with ½ cup honey. Add a coupla tablespoons of Worcestershire Sauce. Nuke until bubbly. Brush on shrimp. Go to bank, procure second mortgage and serve with fresh-sliced New Jersey tomatoes.